今が生死

今朝姉が77歳で亡くなった。4年前に脳梗塞を起こし半身不随になって寝たきりだっ
たがある程度喋れて意志の疎通はできた。３か月前に再発作を起こし、食事も食べな
くなり意志の疎通が出来なくなった。この段階で胃瘻を造設すれば年単位で命が長ら
えられるが家族はそれを選ばなかった。点滴のみで命をつなぎ今日静かに息を引き
取った。今朝その顔を見てきたが今までの苦痛様顔貌が嘘のように安らかだった。本
人も家族も安堵したのではないかと思う。ご主人には頭が下がる。4年前の発作以来1
日も休むことなく病院に通い、食事が食べられる時には食事を食べさせていた。毎日
通っているので同室の患者さんとも仲良くなり看護師さんやリハビリの人の名前も全
て覚えていた。私にはとてもできないといつも思っていた。姉は幸せだったと思う。

My elder sister passed away at the age of 77 this morning. She had a
cerebral infarction 4 years ago and was bedridden as a result of half
paralysis but could speak to some extent and communicate with each other.
She had a recurrent attack 3 months ago, she could not eat meals and could
not communicate.
If she was made a gastrostomy at this stage, her life will be long on a
yearly basis, but the family did not choose it.
She connected her life only with intravenous drip and quietly took her last
breath today.
I saw her face this morning ,her painful face changed to peaceful as a lie.
I think both she and her family were relieved. My head fall down to her
husband. He had come to the hospital without rest for a day since her
attacks four years ago and when she was able to eat meals he helped her
eating. Since he had come every day, he became friend with the patients in
the same room and he remembered all the names of nurses and rehabilitation
staffs. I always thought that I could not do so. I think my elder sister was
happy.