芝生化奮闘記

　何を断ったか言うと酒だ。もうそろそろ丸8年になるがその間一滴の酒も飲んでいない。

 　家庭が平和、妻が幸せ、節約したお金で家も改装できて、健康状態もよし、くだらない失敗もなく、本当にいいこと尽くめだ。

　でも今日は特に断って良かったと思うことがあった。20代前半の若い知り合いから電話があり、「実は俺がアルコール依存症だと思うけどちょっと話を聞いてくれないか」。週1−2回今日は控えめに飲むと決めた日でも記憶がなくなり、始発の電車で帰るはめになり、二日酔いがひどくて仕事を休むこともあり、好きなスポーツの練習もさぼることになり、友達関係がぎくしゃくしたり、誰に相談したらいいかも分からない、アルコール依存症患者にとって自分の過去を振り返る内容だった。

　 近くの断酒会を紹介して、後はいつでも電話くださいと励まして電話を切ったが彼が偉い。まだ20代の前半で自分がそうだと気付いて、人に相談して、助けを求めている。僕の場合は同じ年齢で恐らく既に問題のある飲み方をしていた可能性があるが少なくても30代ではひどい飲み方に変わっていたにも拘らず自分がアルコール依存症であると認めたのは50代直前だった。

　その期間は色々なものを失い、人々に傷をつけ、失敗もし、損もした。でも今は自分の努力で数年間酒を立ち続けていることでこれからの若いやつの少しでもいいから力になれるようになった自分を褒めたい。

 What have I stopped? Drinking. I have not touched a drop of alcohol for nearly eight full years.

 My home is calm, my wife is happy, we have reformed the house significantly, my health is better, I have made almost no stupid mistakes, it is really a win-win-win-win-win situation.

 Today, I realised just how glad I am to have stopped drinking. A young acquaintance in his early-20s called to ask my advice on his drinking, which he feels is in dangerous territory. He told me that on 1-2 occasions a week he finds himself catching the first train home despite having been determined to have only a couple of drinks when going out the previous evening, he finds his work is suffering because of brutal hangovers, he skips training at the sport he loves, his relationships with friends are suffering, he does not know in whom he can confide. It was like a trip through my own past.

  I introduced him to the nearest chapter of the self-support group that has helped me stay sober for eight years and hang up, telling him that he could call me at any time, when I realised just how amazing this lad is. He has recognised at a young age a serious problem he has, has asked advice, and is seeking help, whereas at the same age I was already showing signs of having problems with alcohol, was a serious alcoholic in my mid-30s, but would not admit it to myself or anyone else until just before my 50th birthday.

 In that period, I lost many things, hurt many people, made many mistakes and many losses. But now, merely by stopping drinking for several years, I am in a position in which I am able to offer some help to a young lad just setting out on his life journey. I would like to pat myself on the back, and say well done.