subtle but,
i like walking around in my room naked,or to be more precise,i want to be wearing nothing in my room.sleep without washing off my making up,sleep without pjs or even without taking off dump clothes,sometime "with" shoes.i could spend my weekends only for sleep,just charging myself with certain spot likethis weekend is for sleep,that weekend is for cleaning room o' just walking outsidehaving any particular goal.after drinking to death (8pm to 6am)i would have went back my home to come in there andthrow my body on the crappy bed.i could stay a day or two with no proper foods,when i was too tired to feed myself on good meals.i could call friends anytime i want.or i could be lured outside almost anytime they want.i could just froat around anytime i want.i could stay without noise o' sympathetic dialogues.days go by so smooth, if a stranger looks on it.but for me, for my goodness,subtle-but-daily, invisible stresses mount like something gigantic.and it keeps growing up.i would have loved the cakes of dust on the corner of the room,which had been kept growing up by this lazy dust-lover.the days here are too open.i want the key.not the one to open up sth,but the one to shut up,for establishing perfect, casual isolation.not like saying "leave me alone!!"-kind thing,i just, want to be locked.