勝負の決着
前回の日記で書いた母の日の勝負。結果は…奥様の勝ち~っ!可哀想に、トイレに詰まっている「何か」を取るべく旦那は便器を床から外し、一生懸命作業していました。そして努力の甲斐があり、詰まっていた異物を発見!詰まりの原因はこれ↓(実際に入ってたヤツじゃないよ) アメリカで子育てをしていらっしゃる方はご存知かもしれません。子供用のデンタルフロスです。犯人はおそらく長男。ということで、無事にトイレは直りました。めでたしめでたし。しかし!もう一個のトイレは壊れたまま。キッチンの水道の蛇口はいくら締めてもぽたぽた言ってます。PC のルーターはまだ直ってません。ついでにいうと、PC のファン(?)がここ数日間、ものすごい音をたててます。今にもぶっ壊れそうです。いきなり楽天に現れなくなったら、PC が壊れたのだとお察しください(涙)。◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎ ◎◎◎さて、最近の kanavista 家。学年末を迎え、イベントが目白押しです。長男の誕生日がもうすぐだし、義理の両親が来週来るし、おかげさまで翻訳の仕事もけっこう来るし、キリキリ舞いっす。で、へっぽこ翻訳者の愚痴です。日英翻訳やってらっしゃる方(halric さんはそうだよね)。最近なぜか日英翻訳の仕事ばかり来ます。いや、仕事が来るのはバンバンザイなんだけど、日英って不毛よね。日本語に訳すのは醍醐味があるけど、英語に訳すのは表現の面とかで日本語ネイティブとしては何だか結末がないというか。そんなこと言ってないで英語のライティングの勉強でもすればいいでしょうかね。ああ(涙)。 ★おまけ 1★↓昨日買った食虫植物の写真(ピンぼけ)。長男の宝物。 ★おまけ 2★下は、母の日にまわってきた(長い)ジョークです。これ読んでるかもしれないエスちゃん、ありがとうね。すっごく面白いんで翻訳しようと思ったんだけど、面倒くさいんでやめました。←まただよいや、いつかちゃんと翻訳して、コンテンツに載せるかもしれません。★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆MOM - Job Description POSITION: Mother, Mom, Mama, Mommy, MaJOB DESCRIPTION: Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an, often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.RESPONSIBILITIES: The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT &PROMOTION: Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass youPREVIOUS EXPERIENCE: None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.WAGES AND COMPENSATION: Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.BENEFITS: While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.